The Pile Plan

By: Betty Dangler, Certified Grief Recovery Specialist
Tuesday, May 8, 2018

~~The Pile Plan
Now that Spring is finally here or at least trying to show “its face”, thoughts turn to Spring cleaning. That is why I thought this topic might be of interest to you.


One of the most difficult things for grievers is to decide what to do with the clothes of their loved ones. Some family and friends may insist that you do it right away. You may not be ready. For some, you may want to do this chore with a close family member or friend. For others, you may want to do it alone. You do what feels right for you.
The difficult question is “what do I want to keep?” This plan is to help you with that decision. You want to end up with the items that you really want to keep without keeping things you don’t need or want. So here goes.


Take all the clothes and move them into one room, maybe your living room or an unoccupied room.
Step 1: Group the clothes into piles:
Pile A: all the things you want to keep.
Pile B: all the things you may want to give away to other family members, friends or to charity.
Pile C: all the things you are not sure about yet. If there is any doubt, put the item(s) in this pile.


Step 2: Work with piles:
Put the items in Pile A back in the closet.
Get the items in Pile B ready to give away and pick a day and time to do that.
Put the items in Pile C into bags and boxes and put them in the attic, basement or garage. Congratulate yourself (and your friend or family member if they helped) for your accomplishment. If you feel up to it, do something to celebrate your first steps.
One month later, take the items out in Pile C and go through the process again. Every couple of months you can go through Pile C until it is gone.


When you break the process down into small steps, it does not seem so overwhelming. Eventually you will have accomplished what you intended to do, keep the items you really want. Remember that this is your journey and it starts with small steps.

 

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